1600 Days Of Brexit

After...🎵

Sixteen hundred days of Brexit

The Tories gave to us

Five blatant liars ⁵,

Four dogma years ⁴,

Three failed PMs ³,

Two electoral frauds ²,

And a deal that is worse than re-main ¹.

Fact Check

⁵ Johnson, Gove, Cummings, Rees-Mogg & Farage.

• Johnson: UK gives £350 million per week to EU;
• Gove: father's firm destroyed by EU fisheries policy;
• Cummings: drove to Barnard Castle to test sight;
• Rees-Mogg: lower prices after Brexit;
• Farage: EU officials unelected.

⁴ June 2016 to December 2020.
³ Cameron abdicated, May ousted & Johnson repeated U-turns & incompetence.
² Vote Leave & Leave.EU fined by Electoral Commission for illegal actions during EU referendum.
¹ See for yourself by downloading the two-page summary: https://ec.europa.eu/commission/presscorner/api/files/attachment/867615/EU_Membership_benefits_two_columns.pdf.

Spotter's Guide

 UK government orders gunboats to shoot foreign fish entering British waters.

Top Trumps: Bye Don Edition

A limited edition card has been commissioned to commemorate Donald Trump's presidency of the United States

Careful Now

UK government downgrades its coronavirus guidance from 'vague' to 'meaningless.'

Slogans, Not Policies

We're too busy thinking up patronising slogans to formulate coherent policy or consider its practical implementation, confirms UK Government.

Exit Strategy

UK government reveals exit strategy is identical to coronavirus policy

P.E. Cancelled

"If anyone else is caught playing outside, all P.E. lessons will be cancelled," warns Mr Hancock, the biology teacher.

Coronavirus Slogan

Confusion at Coronavirus briefing as UK government muddles policy notes with slogans